Finding Focus: How I Fortify My Day With A Morning Reading Habit
Life holds a certain dissonance, even in the best of times. Joy comes with pain. Growth with sadness. Not to sound too much like Master Yoda here, but hopefully, you get my point. Life is messy and full of responsibility. People depend on us, and to be successful, we need all the help we can get.
In my own life, this is undoubtedly true. To help fortify my day, I take 15 or twenty minutes each morning to read a daily passage from several books and to review a selection of highlights from past reading. Aside from starting the day with a sense of accomplishment, it also offers me fresh insights related to essential roles in my life.
To accomplish this, I’m using my recently acquired iPad mini, whose primary purpose is to act as a personal reflection tool. I use it for reading, journaling, highlighting, and light note-taking.
The Books
Here's what I'm reading as part of this routine, as well as the corresponding role that it's aimed at improving:
The Daily Dad: 366 Meditations on Parenting, Love, and Raising Great Kids by Ryan Holiday
The Better Parent and Partner
This is the newest addition to my daily reading list. I'm on my first read-through and started it on January 1st. As the title implies, this book is helping me build my toolset as a father. The role of a father is among the most important to me, and as a stay-at-home parent, it's where I spend most of my time on a given day, so having this book as part of my startup is really helpful to remind me of my desire to be a helpful and loving father and husband.
The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday
The Better Human
Now on my fourth read-through, The Daily Stoic is the book that began my interest in Stoicism and daily learning, helping me realize that a few pages a day can be an antidote to the powerful feelings of self-doubt that lurk just outside our field of vision. The Daily Stoic helps to fortify me against my lack of control over external events and reminds me of my power to understand and shape my reaction to those events.
Daily Creative: Find Your Inspiration to Spark Creative Energy and Fight Burnout by Todd Henry
The Better Creative and Professional
My friend Jim suggested this book during one of our regular calls last year, and I enjoyed reading passages sporadically but didn’t quite commit. This year, I'm making it a part of my daily ritual. This feeds my creative self; I'm a better writer and thinker when that gets attention.
After finishing my morning reading, I switch to the second part of this routine and jump from the Kindle app on my iPad Mini to my preferred app that helps me manage and organize highlights from ebooks, articles, and email newsletters, Readwise.
Making and Reviewing Highlights
Much of what I think and write about is sparked by my reading. To manage highlights from things I've read, I use Readwise. I like that I can access all of my saved highlights via the app or the web, and they regularly email me with highlights and summaries to review. You can read more about how I use Readwise in this piece I wrote as part of the PKM Toolkit series.
While I'm reviewing highlights, I have two shortcuts at the ready. The first allows me to easily send a topic idea to a Craft document where I keep possible ideas of interest to write about. The second opens a mind map in Mindnode for a similar purpose. However, this is less focused on specific topic ideas and more on adding bits and pieces to projects or topics already in active development.
Building The Fortification
My daily reading practice is a powerful way to start my day in the right direction and help me build a foundation upon which to work to be a better dad, husband, human, and creative. While this habit is just part of my morning routine, it's crucial to any success I find during my day and offers an outsized reward for my time invested.
Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Creating a Better Second Draft
This week's quote from Ryan Holiday's 2017 book Perennial Seller: The Art of Making and Marketing Work That Lasts is geared towards creators, that's clearly spelled out in the subtitle. However, these ideas apply to other aspects of our lives, too.
You need to find the people you trust to tell you when things aren't working. The people who aren't afraid to potentially hurt your feelings, respectfully, of course, by pointing out the flaws in something you're deeply invested in. Remember, they're doing it for a higher purpose - helping you find your way to the next level where you belong.
There's time to get it closer to where you want it to be, and you won't get there without listening to them. Find your editor. Whether you're a writer, a manager, a student, or a parent, who's the person you trust to advise you on becoming a better version of yourself?
Weekly Quote: Seneca on Delaying Your Anger
These ancient words from Seneca ask you to remember a foundational part of Stoic philosophy: delaying your reaction to anger offers a few moments to find the correct response. This action can bring clarity in the best cases and, at minimum, may allow you to quiet yourself and mute what could be an unreasoned response.
Try this. It takes practice and will only work some of the time. Yet, when it does, you will feel differently, like you’ve made less of a mistake, and that makes this effort worthwhile.
You can find Letters From a Stoic in both print and audio. Ryan Holiday’s The Lives of the Stoics is also an excellent resource to learn more about Seneca and the other Stoic philosophers.
Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Gaining Confidence From Empathy
Ryan Holiday reminds us about the strength of empathy from Courage is Calling: Fortune Favors the Brave. Understanding the context of where a person is in their life means you’ll be able to meet them where they are instead of pushing or pulling them unnecessarily.
This idea is helpful and worthy of your attention anywhere, whether at home with your kids, at work with the team you lead, at the grocery store, or anywhere. Everyone goes through stuff. The more context you have, the better prepared you will be.
Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Overcoming What Other People Think of Us
This week's quote comes from Courage is Calling by Ryan Holiday, reminding us that we shouldn't let what others think get in the way of being who we are and accomplishing what is most important to us.
The vast majority of people aren't paying attention to you or, honestly, anything else. Instead, they're distracted by social media, exhausted by life, or obsessed with what others think of them.
While many people aren't paying attention, you are. This makes a difference.
Make this your superpower. Don't let your perceptions of what others think stop you.
Be the parent you want to be because you aren't worried about embarrassing yourself for being silly on the playground. Buy the car that suits your needs rather than the more expensive one because no one will notice. Be responsible and fruitful at work, but remember to shut things off when you go home to be with your family because most of what will come up can wait until the morning.
Do not live with the manufactured fear of others' opinions. Be bold and take inspiration by remembering the few who are watching you and who matter. Your friends and family, trusted colleagues, and mentors, they are paying attention because they care.
Weekly Quote: The Daily Stoic on the Power of Authentic Connection
This week’s quote comes from The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman. An idea like this that we do our best when we don’t pretend to be someone we aren’t but instead open ourselves up and listen to others is something worth being reminded of often.
I don’t necessarily read this book every day, life is too imperfect for that right now, but I read it most days and have been doing so for years. I recommend you check it out, too. It’s worth a few minutes (almost) every day for a reminder of how to practice living a richer and more meaningful life.
Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Realizing Your Full Potential
This week’s quote is from Discipline is Destiny by Ryan Holiday.
It's bad enough to let someone else down, but letting yourself down is a failure of possibility. It's a reminder of what you should be doing and who you might become. If that doesn't motivate you to stretch and reach your potential, I'm not sure what will.
The Daily Stoic Kindle Edition is on Sale
The Kindle edition of The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living is on sale for a great price today. I’ve been reading this book on a near-daily basis for several years in both hardcover and Kindle. I recommend it to anyone interested in stoicism and personal development. It’s a page or two of wisdom each day that can help shape things for the better.
Ryan Holiday on Building Better Habits in 2023
Ryan Holiday recently shared a thoughtful piece on building habits that stick for the new year. His writing inspires me as a creator and human, and I’m sure you’ll find something in the piece that resonates with you.
Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Preparing for the Hard
This week’s quote comes from Discipline is Destiny by Ryan Holiday.
Setting expectations about something is a big part of managing the outcome. If you assume it will be easy, and it isn’t, that will be much more complicated than if you’re ready for a challenge.
The good news is that most of the time, things aren’t quite as hard as you expect. Still, if you put the time in and study for the test, you’re bound to do better regardless of the actual difficulty level. Over and over, you will find that practice makes progress, and preparation is the winning strategy for most of what you will encounter.
Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Good Deeds
This week’s quote comes from Stillness Is the Key by Ryan Holiday.
The context here is bravery; the reward for hard work internally is a strong sense of accomplishment and inner peace. Externally, pushing past the easy choices can impact those around you by showing them what you’re made of and how much they mean to you. Be brave, and inspire those around you to follow that path.
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Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Focus and The Muses
This week’s quote comes from Discipline is Destiny by Ryan Holiday.
Focus can be hard to find. There have always been distractions, but they’ve gotten much louder thanks to the tiny supercomputer in your pocket or bag.
Modern tech is a wonder. The Internet has changed our lives and given us so much. Yet, it takes effort to avoid the pitfalls of the always-on data firehose, with apps designed to keep you swiping and engaged, watching, and captivated. Sometimes, there's not much difference between being captivated and captured save for a bit of charm.
It may be something else too. Perhaps your time is not your own anymore. You are busy being a parent, working two jobs to pay the bills, or acting as a caretaker for a family member because they have no one else. When the day ends, you are too exhausted to do anything aside from preparing for the next challenge.
Regardless of what is pulling at you, try to find some time that is yours. Doing so will help you manage your stress and gain perspective. Put your phone away, Take a few deep breaths, daydream a little, go for a short walk, or even write in your journal. Give yourself space to think and listen carefully to what comes to mind.
Make this time a priority. Practice putting the distractions and burdens of life in a metaphorical box, knowing that they will be waiting for you when you're done, and gift yourself one of the most priceless commodities, a little time.
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Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Consistency and Willpower
This week's quote comes from Discipline is Destiny, the new book by Ryan Holiday. I wrote about this book and Ryan's impact on my creative journey earlier in the week.
Another complementary theme to this quote I've encountered in Ryan's work is waking up early to get stuff done, to build the habit of consistency. It isn't always easy to wake up at 5 am to write, but it's what I've been doing regularly for the last few weeks. I'm finding real gains, personally and around the content I can create by building this time into my daily schedule. I'm also happier because I want to do this, I enjoy it, and it's meaningful to me.
I get roughly an hour before the rest of the house begins to wake up, aside from the cats who usually join me. Sometimes, one of my children wakes up early, and I only have twenty minutes, but it's still time spent moving the needle, writing a few sentences, organizing some thoughts, and maybe planning for what's coming next.
It is incremental. It is day-to-day. This is becoming a theme for me because it works. Small gains every day result in something more significant, and that is precisely what I'm trying to accomplish.
Discipline is Destiny
Ryan Holiday's new book, Discipline is Destiny: The Power of Self Control is available today. Discipline is the second in the Stoic Virtues Series, following last year's release of Courage is Calling.
I pre-ordered a signed copy directly from Ryan, which arrived on Saturday. I'm already a few chapters in, highlighter in hand. Ryan is one of those authors whose work I typically purchase in multiple formats, usually Kindle and in print. I have several of his books on audio too. As I said, I'm a fan!
I recommend either The Obstacle is the Way or Courage is Calling for someone new to his work. Although you won’t go wrong with any of his books, particularly the ones focused on Stoicism.
Here's Where I Started
I walked into a book store on a snowy December afternoon in 2017, and The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living caught my eye. It was on a table themed around the coming new year. Although I did not know who Ryan was then, I immediately knew this was a book I wanted to read.
More importantly, it was a book that I needed to read.
I had just finished four years as a business owner and was starting a new mid-level operations management job at a distressed account. I was dealing with a lot of anxiety, and The Daily Stoic was part of how I ended my day and managed the stress. I'd read the day's passage, maybe do a little journaling or some other reading, and go to bed. The book helped me stay grounded after many long and draining days of putting out fires, rebuilding the team, and developing relationships with everyone from the C-Suite to the frontline.
Six years after finding The Daily Stoic, I reach for it nearly every day and still feel like I'm learning new things. I hope you have a book or something similar that does the same for you. If you don’t yet, you know what I recommend.
Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on the Anger Trap
This week’s quote comes from a favorite book I regularly read: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.
Anger usually results in pain, frustration, and a loss of clarity and connection. It is an emotion that is the worst kind of fuel. We all deserve better, as do our co-workers, team members, families, and friends.
Have you noticed that the people around you who are always angry want you to join them? It’s usually true. Angry people find other like-minded people. They want to be miserable together and are always recruiting. Don’t get drawn in. Remember, your anger is their fuel.
The first principle in Stoicism, as this quote from Ward Farnsworth discusses, is that you don’t react to events but instead react to your judgments about them. So choose to respond without anger. Don’t fuel the rage, and don’t fall into their trap.
Weekly Quote: Courage is Calling by Ryan Holiday
This week’s quote comes from Ryan Holiday’s latest book, Courage is Calling: Fortune Favors the Brave. Ryan is one of my favorite authors. His books and emails are always on my reading and re-reading list, and I frequently recommend The Daily Stoic to friends who want an introduction to Stoic philosophy. It’s where I started.
In Courage is Calling, Ryan writes about many aspects of courage, including difference between being scared and feeling fear. It’s one of the ideas from this book that I’ve really been chewing on. He quotes William Faulkner, who wrote a similar sentiment about walking in the woods, “Be scared. You can’t help that. But don’t be afraid.”
Before reading this book, I hadn’t deeply considered the difference between fear and being scared. Fear is more conceptual, and being scared is an emotional response the body experiences. It’s helpful to have such a distinction clearly laid out by a thinker that I respect, to understand that it’s okay to be scared, and then it’s essential to act anyway, not let fear paralyze you and prevent you from achieving what needs to be done.
I’m doing my best to remember this quote when I am heading into the unknown and begin to feel dread. I’ll allow myself to be scared, but I will fight the fear.
Handling Minor Adversity
Here’s a great reminder that how we handle the little things matter, whether at work with our teams or colleagues or at home with our kids, partners, or in-laws.
For leaders, the little things can be a big part of a given day, and minor adversity happens all the time. So remember this quote the next time it seems you can’t catch a break. How you react matters, and people are watching and listening to learn how you handle it and who you are.
Once they find out, they won’t forget.